A old friend I worked with for years would say when someone asked “where is it”? He would reply….

”Up A Fat Ladies Ass”

lol

Post up an old saying. No politics please.

"differant strokes for differant folks"

Colder than a witches tit in a brass bra!

It's all shits and giggles until someone giggles and shits

 

 

Grandma was a tough lady who helped farm  and was ‘big boned’.  She loved to cook and sometimes served 30-50 people.  She had a saying ‘The skinny ones die just like the fat ones’ 

Righty tighty - Lefty loosey................. 

Had an old guy I use to play cards with.  Get behind early on the game and he’d always say ‘A dog that shits fast, don’t shit long’ 

So cold it would freeze the balls of a brass monkey.

Brass monkey was a rack to store cannon balls secure on a ship's deck. It would get so cold the brass would warp and the balls would roll off... hence...

"sh-t house mouse"

Her face is so ugly she would scare the bull dog of a Mack truck !!!

She has seen more ass then a toilet seat 

Her ass is 4 axe handles wide 

She has more chins then a Chinese phone book 

HOLD YOUR WATER!    Go pound sand!                                  Anyone post  =   take a long walk off a short pier. 

He is slower than a 7 year itch

Wasn't that a dilly 

If you could harrow what I plowed in a day you would be a good man !!

7 hours ago, steve from amherst said:

"Hammer and nails I do my best , paint and puddy will do the rest"

 

Wood glue and puddy is a carpenters buddy

 

Ya, my dad again, similar stuff. "Do your best and hire a good painter to hide the rest".

If she had as many pricks sticking out of her as she had stuck in her she'd be a porcupine.

The wife dropped one today when the kid in the recycle truck had to back up

"If you can't find em , grind em"

I fucking laughed 

Just now, HSR said:

If she had as many pricks sticking out of her as she had stuck in her she'd be a porcupine.

Or a pin cushion LOL 

Just now, The One said:

Or a pin cushion LOL 

The old fella was a trapper so porcupine it was 

7 hours ago, steve from amherst said:

"Hammer and nails I do my best , paint and puddy will do the rest"

 

Wood glue and puddy is a carpenters buddy

Puddy and paint makes you what you ain't..

He is so old he saw the Toronto Maple Leafs win the Stanley cup !!!

17 minutes ago, HSR said:

The wife dropped one today when the kid in the recycle truck had to back up

"If you can't find em , grind em"

I fucking laughed 

My dad use to yell I'll take a 1/2 pound since it's freshly ground............. 

With booze you lose, with Dope there's hope........