SSFB Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 Quote WASHINGTON—Expressing concerns about the propriety of being left alone with a syrup container of the opposite sex, Vice President Mike Pence reportedly asked his waiter Thursday to remove Mrs. Butterworth from the table until his wife arrived to join him at a local diner. “Excuse me, sir, would you please take this out of my line of sight until my wife gets here?” said Pence, who reportedly attempted to put the table’s sugar dispenser and salt and pepper shakers between him and the feminine syrup bottle before deciding that even having Mrs. Butterworth within arm’s reach could lead him to have impure thoughts. “It just would not be right for me to sit here alone with a woman-shaped container, particularly one as shapely as this. In fact, I would advise you to do the same for the man sitting over there—I see he is sitting very close to Mrs. Butterworth even though he appears to be wearing a wedding ring.” At press time, Pence had asked the waiter to pour syrup on his pancakes for him, as it would be unseemly to handle the curves of the plastic woman in such a public place. https://politics.theonion.com/mike-pence-asks-waiter-to-remove-mrs-butterworth-from-1819579759?utm_medium=sharefromsite&utm_source=onionpolitics_facebook&utm_campaign=bottom&fbclid=IwAR2ICS3XoPe6qT_BcKSOmMrBnpnWustPGG8mU5_nSPO39DL6qOLgp_v26tQ 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anler Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gold Member Kivalo Posted July 19, 2019 Gold Member Share Posted July 19, 2019 Real maple syrup FTW!!! Who the fuck eats that Butterworth shit anyway? 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 3 minutes ago, Kivalo said: Real maple syrup FTW!!! Who the fuck eats that Butterworth shit anyway? Nobody. At least nobody I would associate with. Fucking heathens! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zambroski Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 10 minutes ago, Kivalo said: Real maple syrup FTW!!! Who the fuck eats that Butterworth shit anyway? 6 minutes ago, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot said: Nobody. At least nobody I would associate with. Fucking heathens! Fucking pole syrup. Grody. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SSFB Posted July 19, 2019 Author Share Posted July 19, 2019 10 minutes ago, Zambroski said: Fucking pole syrup. Grody. I bet you prefer Mr. Butterworth's syrup!!!!!!11 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zambroski Posted July 19, 2019 Share Posted July 19, 2019 Just now, SSFB said: I bet you prefer Mr. Butterworth's syrup!!!!!!11 This was racist!!! Gender fluidity!!!! U Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SSFB Posted July 19, 2019 Author Share Posted July 19, 2019 4 minutes ago, Zambroski said: This was racist!!! Gender fluidity!!!! U But I identify as non-racist so you got Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zambroski Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 2 minutes ago, SSFB said: But I identify as non-racist so you got That makes you a transbigot tho!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AKIQPilot Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 He's just lucky it wasn't Aunt Jemima's syrup. He would have been labeled a racist. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SSFB Posted July 20, 2019 Author Share Posted July 20, 2019 4 minutes ago, Zambroski said: That makes you a transbigot tho!!!! No that's u!!!!!!!11 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spin_dry Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 (edited) 1 hour ago, Kivalo said: Real maple syrup FTW!!! Who the fuck eats that Butterworth shit anyway? 550 loves it when butterworth face sits. Edited July 20, 2019 by spin_dry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Anler Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 1 hour ago, SSFB said: I bet you prefer Mr. Butterworth's syrup!!!!!!11 On the pole! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 56 minutes ago, spin_dry said: 550 loves it when butterworth face sits. Ya' know, you're not even funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spin_dry Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 26 minutes ago, Polaris 550 said: Ya' know, you're not even funny. Who was trying to be funny? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 46 minutes ago, spin_dry said: Who was trying to be funny? Just sayin', you aren't funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
awful knawful Posted July 20, 2019 Share Posted July 20, 2019 10 hours ago, spin_dry said: 550 loves it when butterworth face sits. SWAMP ASS SPECIAL! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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