Platinum Contributing Member SnowRider Posted November 4, 2016 Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted November 4, 2016 SHARE 11K Hillary Clinton [parody]Follow 45th President of the United States, patriarchy smasher, bad motherfucker Jul 25 Let Me Remind You Fuckers Who I Am by Hillary Clinton What the fuck is your problem, America?? I’m Hillary goddamn Clinton. I’m a political prodigy, have been since I was 16. I have an insane network of powerful friends. I’m willing to spend the next eight years catching shit on all sides, all so I can fix this fucking country for you. And all you little bitches need to do is get off your asses one goddamn day in November. “Oh but what about your eeeemaaaaillls???” Shut the fuck up. Seriously, shut the fuck up and listen for one fucking second. Here’s all you need to know about me: In 1992, I said I was proud to have followed my career instead of baking cookies. The GOP fucking dragged me for it. They made me bake cookies. They’re scared of me. Every time I have a job, y’all love me. Every time I run for anything, the GOP breaks out the big guns again and fucks me up good. And apparently it fucking works. But you know what? I don’t fucking care. If I gave two shits about the haters I would’ve dropped the game decades ago. You know why I keep fighting? Because we all want the same shit. We want economic and racial justice, we want to seriously attack climate change, we want everyone to be able to afford college and health care and housing and food, we want women to be treated like humans, yada yada yada. And I’m the only person in this goddamn country who knows how to do it. Because of course I do. Because I’ve been preparing my whole fucking life for this job. So stop making me dab on Ellen and just give me a fucking chance already. If it seems like I have contempt for the American voter, it’s because I do. Frankly, most of you are fucking stupid. Most of you have no goddamn idea what it takes to run a country. I mean god damn, almost half of you think God created the Earth 10,000 years ago! What the actual fuck???? Look, this is the big leagues. If you think any problem has a tweetable solution, you’re just wrong. If you think “border wall” or “muslims = bad” is gonna solve our problems, I don’t have time for your shit. This is literally why we have a representative government. I know you don’t want to read long, boring things. So I do it for you, and I ask a bunch of smart people, and we come up with shit that works. Here’s my solution on energy. Here’s my solution on Wall Street. Here’s my solution on jobs. I have fucking binders full of this shit and you know it. I’m so fucking ready, America. The GOP just spent their entire convention fantasizing about literally imprisoning me. They are terrified. They know what I can do. I’ve spent my life clawing my way into a system that’s terrified of change. A system that just wants to let rich white dudes be rich white dudes. And holy shit, you guys, I could not have picked a better opponent for my final boss battle. So lemme sign off with the same Nancy Scheibner poem I quoted back in 1969 (when I gave the commencement speech at my own fucking graduation, btw). My entrance into the world of so-called “social problems” Must be with quiet laughter, or not at all. The hollow men of anger and bitterness The bountiful ladies of righteous degradation All must be left to a bygone age.And the purpose of history is to provide a receptacle For all those myths and oddments Which oddly we have acquired And from which we would become unburdenedTo create a newer world To translate the future into the past. We have no need of false revolutions In a world where categories tend to tyrannize our minds And hang our wills up on narrow pegs. It is well at every given moment to seek the limits in our lives. And once those limits are understood To understand that limitations no longer exist. Earth could be fair. And you and I must be free Not to save the world in a glorious crusade Not to kill ourselves with a nameless gnawing pain But to practice with all the skill of our being The art of making possible. (Flip flop my ass.) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member SnowRider Posted November 4, 2016 Author Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted November 4, 2016 Sums up the forum nicely.....and slingers buckets If it seems like I have contempt for the American voter, it’s because I do. Frankly, most of you are fucking stupid. Most of you have no goddamn idea what it takes to run a country. I mean god damn, almost half of you think God created the Earth 10,000 years ago! What the actual fuck???? Look, this is the big leagues. If you think any problem has a tweetable solution, you’re just wrong. If you think “border wall” or “muslims = bad” is gonna solve our problems, I don’t have time for your shit. This is literally why we have a representative government. I know you don’t want to read long, boring things. So I do it for you, and I ask a bunch of smart people, and we come up with shit that works. Here’s my solution on energy. Here’s my solution on Wall Street. Here’s my solution on jobs. I have fucking binders full of this shit and you know it. I’m so fucking ready, America. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oleroule Posted November 4, 2016 Share Posted November 4, 2016 a parody...much like the op. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JEFF Posted November 4, 2016 Share Posted November 4, 2016 Good god you're a fuckhead. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoslinger Posted November 4, 2016 Share Posted November 4, 2016 zing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member Skidooski Posted November 4, 2016 Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted November 4, 2016 Boom....NAILED IT!!!!!!!!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member SnowRider Posted November 4, 2016 Author Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted November 4, 2016 10 minutes ago, Snoslinger said: zing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momorider Posted November 4, 2016 Share Posted November 4, 2016 56 minutes ago, JEFF said: Good god you're a fuckhead. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member SnowRider Posted November 4, 2016 Author Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted November 4, 2016 The Cyber Klan fits the parody to a T The butthurt on here next week will be epic..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Momorider Posted November 4, 2016 Share Posted November 4, 2016 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crnr2Crnr Posted February 27 Share Posted February 27 On 11/4/2016 at 10:14 AM, SnowRider said: SHARE 11K Hillary Clinton [parody]Follow 45th President of the United States, patriarchy smasher, bad motherfucker Jul 25 Let Me Remind You Fuckers Who I Am by Hillary Clinton What the fuck is your problem, America?? I’m Hillary goddamn Clinton. I’m a political prodigy, have been since I was 16. I have an insane network of powerful friends. I’m willing to spend the next eight years catching shit on all sides, all so I can fix this fucking country for you. And all you little bitches need to do is get off your asses one goddamn day in November. “Oh but what about your eeeemaaaaillls???” Shut the fuck up. Seriously, shut the fuck up and listen for one fucking second. Here’s all you need to know about me: In 1992, I said I was proud to have followed my career instead of baking cookies. The GOP fucking dragged me for it. They made me bake cookies. They’re scared of me. Every time I have a job, y’all love me. Every time I run for anything, the GOP breaks out the big guns again and fucks me up good. And apparently it fucking works. But you know what? I don’t fucking care. If I gave two shits about the haters I would’ve dropped the game decades ago. You know why I keep fighting? Because we all want the same shit. We want economic and racial justice, we want to seriously attack climate change, we want everyone to be able to afford college and health care and housing and food, we want women to be treated like humans, yada yada yada. And I’m the only person in this goddamn country who knows how to do it. Because of course I do. Because I’ve been preparing my whole fucking life for this job. So stop making me dab on Ellen and just give me a fucking chance already. If it seems like I have contempt for the American voter, it’s because I do. Frankly, most of you are fucking stupid. Most of you have no goddamn idea what it takes to run a country. I mean god damn, almost half of you think God created the Earth 10,000 years ago! What the actual fuck???? Look, this is the big leagues. If you think any problem has a tweetable solution, you’re just wrong. If you think “border wall” or “muslims = bad” is gonna solve our problems, I don’t have time for your shit. This is literally why we have a representative government. I know you don’t want to read long, boring things. So I do it for you, and I ask a bunch of smart people, and we come up with shit that works. Here’s my solution on energy. Here’s my solution on Wall Street. Here’s my solution on jobs. I have fucking binders full of this shit and you know it. I’m so fucking ready, America. The GOP just spent their entire convention fantasizing about literally imprisoning me. They are terrified. They know what I can do. I’ve spent my life clawing my way into a system that’s terrified of change. A system that just wants to let rich white dudes be rich white dudes. And holy shit, you guys, I could not have picked a better opponent for my final boss battle. So lemme sign off with the same Nancy Scheibner poem I quoted back in 1969 (when I gave the commencement speech at my own fucking graduation, btw). My entrance into the world of so-called “social problems” Must be with quiet laughter, or not at all. The hollow men of anger and bitterness The bountiful ladies of righteous degradation All must be left to a bygone age. And the purpose of history is to provide a receptacle For all those myths and oddments Which oddly we have acquired And from which we would become unburdened To create a newer world To translate the future into the past. We have no need of false revolutions In a world where categories tend to tyrannize our minds And hang our wills up on narrow pegs. It is well at every given moment to seek the limits in our lives. And once those limits are understood To understand that limitations no longer exist. Earth could be fair. And you and I must be free Not to save the world in a glorious crusade Not to kill ourselves with a nameless gnawing pain But to practice with all the skill of our being The art of making possible. (Flip flop my ass.) you seem passionate about climate change. have you considered relocating to Alaska? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member SnowRider Posted February 27 Author Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted February 27 1 minute ago, Crnr2Crnr said: you seem passionate about climate change. have you considered relocating to Alaska? Since you’ve be trolling my posts are you a denier? Only people dumber than climate deniers are those who think there’s a third option in November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Crnr2Crnr Posted February 27 Share Posted February 27 1 minute ago, SnowRider said: Since you’ve be trolling my posts are you a denier? Only people dumber than climate deniers are those who think there’s a third option in November Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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