Today's Joke

[XCR1250]

Lena is pregnant with Ole's child. Late one night, Lena vakes up Ole and says, 'I tink it's time!'  

So Ole fired up the Yohn Deere tractor and took her to the hospital to have their first baby.
She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Ole and said, 'A son! Ain't dat Great!'

Well, Ole got excited by dis, but yust den the doctor spoke up and said, Hold on! We ain't Finished yet!'
The doctor den held up a little girl..
He said, 'Hey, Ole! You got you a daughter! She's a pretty little ting, too.'

Ole got kind of puzzled by this, and then the doctor said, 'Holey Moley Ole, we still ain't done yet!'

The doctor then delivered another boy and said, 'Ole, you yust had yourself another boy!'
Ole was flabbergasted by this news!

A couple days later, Ole brought Lena and their three children home in the self-propelled combine.
He was real serious and he asked Lena , 'How come we got tree on the first try?'

Lena said, 'You remember dat night we ran out of Vaseline and you vent out in the garage and got dat dere 3-in-1 Oil?'

Ole said, 'Yeah, I do... Uffda!

It's a darn good ting I didn't get the WD-40.'

[Jerry 976]

A little boy and his dad were walking thru the park and the little boy sees two dogs "going at it"

The little boy asked his dad, what are those two dogs doing??

The dad, Their making puppies

The Little boy, Oh ok

Later that night the little boy walks into mom & dads room and mom & dad are "going at it" 

The little boy asks what are you and mommy doing??

The dad replies were making you a little brother or sister

The little boys replies, roll her over I'd rather have a Puppy.......... 

[Ez ryder]

A man walks in to a psychiatrists office wrapped in cellophane 

 

And the doctor said i can clearly see your nuts 

[Ez ryder]

A guy siting at a bar asked a woman sitting next to him,

Excuse me, but can I smell your pussy?"

"Get away from me, you pervert," she replied.

"Oh, I'm sorry," exclaims the guy, "It must be your feet."