snatchslayer Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 7 minutes ago, f7ben said: What my wife and I went through is no different than what countless people go through all the time ....many have it much worse. Thanks though My whole point is that in that situation there is no right way to react. Everyone acts how they think they should and some people cant keep it together. You cant put yourself in their shoes unless you have lived their whole life. All types of life experience will impact how you think you should act in that situation. Maybe she was trying not to act like a stereotypical hysterical black woman like most would expect her to react. Its just not something I would ever condemn someone or judge them for. Very true Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member Skidooski Posted June 23, 2017 Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted June 23, 2017 10 minutes ago, f7ben said: Me too , I was rational and numb and didnt feel a whole lot of anything other than the fact that I had a dead 23 year old wife and a 6 day old daughter to take care of. It was a trip for sure. Thankfully a very talented neurosurgeon decided emergency burr hole procedure was worth a shot and the rest is history. I don't know much, if any, of your history but it sounds like she pulled though? If that's the case, which I sure hope is the case, then I am very happy to hear! If not and I am wrong then I sincerely apologize. I had to sit and watch my wife in Hospice running on only her brain stem for almost 3 weeks. She withered away and eventually passed on. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snake Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 8 minutes ago, f7ben said: What my wife and I went through is no different than what countless people go through all the time ....many have it much worse. Thanks though My whole point is that in that situation there is no right way to react. Everyone acts how they think they should and some people cant keep it together. You cant put yourself in their shoes unless you have lived their whole life. All types of life experience will impact how you think you should act in that situation. Maybe she was trying not to act like a stereotypical hysterical black woman like most would expect her to react. Its just not something I would ever condemn someone or judge them for. I'm very happy it all worked out. However on the bold: You do it... All. The. Time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
f7ben Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 24 minutes ago, Skidooski said: I don't know much, if any, of your history but it sounds like she pulled though? If that's the case, which I sure hope is the case, then I am very happy to hear! If not and I am wrong then I sincerely apologize. I had to sit and watch my wife in Hospice running on only her brain stem for almost 3 weeks. She withered away and eventually passed on. She is 99% recovered and most would never know. I can tell where her deficits are and she is on seizure meds for life but it worked out well for us. The toughest part for me was having what was essentially a new person with different strengths and weaknesses to be partners with. I am incredibly sorry to hear about your wife and you having to deal with that. I just try to tell people that whatever happens to you the reality is that you arent unique and that countless other people will have to deal with the same things. Its part of life , its actually a part of life we should all appreciate as it shapes who we are. Everyone is going to die one way or another , celebrate what we have while we have it. Some would say your wife passing at 30 is an incredible tragedy ....but I would hope she had 30 incredible years with many great life experiences. Some will pass at 5 or 3 or in the incubator and never get all the chances your wife had. I guess its a glass half full attitude but its the reality I choose to subscribe to. 24 minutes ago, Snake said: I'm very happy it all worked out. However on the bold: You do it... All. The. Time. Thanks , I know and I'll try and do that less. There are some things I will not compromise on though. The outright destruction of our rights is one of them. I'll cast the first stone when that is the sin someone has committed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Platinum Contributing Member Skidooski Posted June 23, 2017 Platinum Contributing Member Share Posted June 23, 2017 (edited) 40 minutes ago, f7ben said: She is 99% recovered and most would never know. I can tell where her deficits are and she is on seizure meds for life but it worked out well for us. The toughest part for me was having what was essentially a new person with different strengths and weaknesses to be partners with. I am incredibly sorry to hear about your wife and you having to deal with that. I just try to tell people that whatever happens to you the reality is that you arent unique and that countless other people will have to deal with the same things. Its part of life , its actually a part of life we should all appreciate as it shapes who we are. Everyone is going to die one way or another , celebrate what we have while we have it. Some would say your wife passing at 30 is an incredible tragedy ....but I would hope she had 30 incredible years with many great life experiences. Some will pass at 5 or 3 or in the incubator and never get all the chances your wife had. I guess its a glass half full attitude but its the reality I choose to subscribe to. Thanks Ben I appreciate the kind words! She had her own set of beliefs and part of them were that any person only received so many chances, or lives, and she thought that she had surpassed that number. So she always looked at me and smiled and told me she must be my personal angel put her on earth to help me. Edited June 23, 2017 by Skidooski Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
f7ben Posted June 23, 2017 Share Posted June 23, 2017 11 minutes ago, Skidooski said: Thanks Ben I appreciate the kind words! She had her own set of beliefs and part of them were that any person only received so many chances, or lives, and she thought that she had surpassed that number. So she always looked at me and smiled and told me she must be my personal angel put her on earth to help me. That was tough to read .....thanks dick 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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