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Today's Joke


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Why Italian Fathers and Grandfathers pass their handguns down through
the family:

   An old Italian man is dying. He calls his

grandson to his bedside, Guido, I

wan' you lissina me. I wan' you to take-a my chrome

plated ..38 revolver so

you will always remember me."

   "But grandpa, I really don't

like guns.. How about you leave me your Rolex

watch instead?"

   "You lissina me, boy. Somma day you

gonna be runna da business, you gonna

have a beautiful wife, lotsa money, a big-a home and maybe a

couple of

bambinos. "

   "Somma day you gonna come-a home and

maybe finda you wife inna bed with

another man.

   "Whatta you gonna do then? Pointa to

you watch and say, 'times up' "?
 

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A father buys a lie detector robot that slaps people when they lie.

He decides to test it out at dinner one night. The father asks his son what he did that afternoon.

The son says, "I did some schoolwork."

The robot slaps the son.

The son says, "Ok, Ok. I was at a friend's house watching movies."

Dad asks, "What movie did you watch?"

Son says, "Toy Story."

The robot slaps the son again.

Son says, "Ok, Ok, we were watching Stormy Daniels movies."

Dad says," What? At your age I didn't even know what dirty movies were."

The robot slaps the father!

Mom laughs and says, "Well, he certainly is your son."

The robot slaps the mother.

Robot for sale.

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